JUDGE: ”Thank you, Officer Schmidt. You may step down.”

TESTIMONY OF THE ONLY OTHER WITNESSES:

OLD LADY: ”Judge, I was just going home, minding my own business and this here thug snuck up on me, and he said, "I’ll take that bag!” And then he grabbed my groceries! And then I kicked him in the shins, and I screamed like hell! That’s when the officer came running, and knocked him down and arrested him.”

THE ACCUSED: "Your Honor, I saw this old woman crossing the street, struggling with a heavy bag. I caught up with her - and I took the bag just as she was about to drop it. Then she kicked me, and the cop came out of nowhere, and tackled me. Look, he tore my pants!. I was only trying to help.”
                                             -o-                 
JUDGE: ”...disturbing the peace. Mr. Spicer, step down, and pay the cashier three hundred dollars - cash, check, money or credit card."