| General Script posted December 18, 2016 | Chapters: |
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Pons and Ned form a MENSA Chapter
A chapter in the book Scenes
Scene at a MENSA Meeting
by Bill Schott
I am re-posting some earlier Pons and Ned scenes as I am reviewing and assembling them to edit into a flowing script. I will add continued scenes as I do to form a bridge.
The scene opens in a back corner of a Big Boy restaurant. Pons and Ned have formed a local MENSA Chapter. Their first meeting is between the two of them.
Pons: Well, Ned. Let's start a log and make a list of men and women, potential members, to contact. Ned: Men AND women? Pons: Well yes, Ned. We will want all who qualify. Ned: Ain't we a 'Men's' club? Pons: A MENSA club, Ned. Folks in the 96 percentile of intelligence quotient. Ned: No kiddin'? Well, that's you fer sure, Pons. Why you kin quote more intelligant dudes than that bald captain on Star Track. Pons: Intelligence quotient, Ned - I.Q. Ned: Maybe LIKE YOU, Pons, but my parsontile's got a dot in it. A deckemal. Pons: So you're a 9.6, Ned? Ned: Yeah! I'd call myself a 10, but my humble-bility keeps me modest. Pons: You have room for improvement, Ned. Let's make a list of people to call. Ned: Donald Trump. Pons: You have his number? Ned: Heck no, Pons. I'll tweet 'im. Pons: I'm calling my old high school teacher, Mrs. Nash. Ned: Nasty Nashy! Pons: What do mean, Ned? Ned: Didn't she sleep with half the football team? Pons: Where did you hear that? Ned: It was on Twitter. Pons: Ned, she's in her seventies. Ned: Damn! And that ain't but half the team!?! Pons: No, Ned. I mean it's not true. Ned: Hey! I got a tweet back from The Donald. He says a Mensa Club with him as a member would be the greatest that anyone has ever seen. Pons: Well, that sounds -- Ned: He also says that he knows more than all the Mensa. Pons: Yes, well -- Ned: There'd be winnin' and winnin'. Pons: We'll keep him in mind. Ned: He also says that Nasty Nashy ought to be infestigated by the PDA. Pons: The PTA? Ned: I figured he meant Purdy Dern Awful. Pons: Public displays of affection. Ned: She done it in public? Wait'il I tweet Donny. Pons: Ned. What about the club? Ned: Okay, Pons. Once we got Trump, and Miz Nasty, we ought to call that gal what knows all the directions to turn while we's drivin'. Pons: She is not a real person, Ned. Ned: I thunk you said women were real people. Pons: Ned, I mean that she -- Ned: Never mind. Mr. Trump says he has known her, in bib-lickle ways, and she was a disaster. Pons: That makes no sense. Ned: Bib-lickle scents, Pons. The bestest kind. To be continued...
All the misspellings are intentional.
Pays
one point
and 2 member cents. MENSA is an international group who get together and discuss important topics outside the spheres of politics, religion, race, or other dividing factors. Mensa is Latin for table, and is based on the idea of a 'round table' forum of equality. Image from Google 
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