The red Dress Chapter eighteen.

    











 The next morning Lisa lay awake beside Alan while he still slept, and thought about everything they had discussed the night before.
 
     She had been so financially protected all her life, and money had never been an issue. Alan was right when he called her a spoilt bitch, if being one meant you didn't appreciate how much it cost to live. She didn't have a clue. Lisa had never had money of her own, not even a savings account, so she had never had to manage it, far less worry about it.
 
   It was a sad realisation that not having to work for a living, had probably swayed her into accepting Nick's proposal of marraige. She would have gone straight from one financially secure provider to another. It wasn't until she met Alan that she realised money and security weren't everything.
 
     Now the thought that money, or the lack of it, could be the deciding factor as to whether she and Alan could stay together or not, depressed her beyond belief. Alan had spent a good part of the night explaining his fears, and she knew where he was coming from regarding his parents. It had been obvious from their comments the night before that they were very fond of Carla, and expected her and Alan to end up getting married. So Alan was right in assuming they would be none too pleased if she was the reason that they didn't.
 
     The trouble her mother had caused the previous week would always make them associate Lisa with aggravation and embarrassment, and for that, she couldn't blame them. Anyone would feel the same. Who would want their son to be associated with someone with a mother like hers? It was also obvious that although he had spent most of the previous night trying to convince her otherwise, Alan was desperately worried about how he would be able to support them, should his parents object to their relationship. There was no question of Alan getting a job, he was three quarters way through his degree and he had to concentrate on his studies - and anyway, why should he? His parents were quite happy to support him. It was her who was the problem. All in all she felt like a burden, and she was worried that being a burden would wreck their relationship. The more she thought about it, the more hopeless it seemed to be.
 
     When Alan woke up he instinctively reached out for her and drew her close, remembering the night before and the pain he’d  felt when he thought he'd lost her.
 
     “What you thinking?” he asked sleepily; when he noticed she seemed to be a million miles away in her thoughts.
 
He nuzzled the back of her neck while he waited for her answer.
 
     "I'm going to have to get a job," she announced.
.
Okay, so making love was obviously not at the top of Lisa's priorities, he decided. Remembering how late they’d stayed up talking the night before, he stopped kissing the back of her neck, and propping himself up on one elbow, looked down at her quizzically.
 
     “What kind of job?” he asked.
 
Lisa shook her head. She had spent the last twenty minutes asking herself the same question.
 
     “I don't know - anything, as long as it earns enough money to keep us.”
 
Alan thought for a moment, as his finger traced imaginary circles on one of her breasts.
 
     “Well, what we've got to work out, is what you're good at.”
 
Lisa shook her head again, feeling totally useless.
 
     “Nothing.” she replied, wishing that she knew results of her exams. They hadn't arrived before she left Scotland.
 
     “Well that isn't strictly true….” he mused, as his finger moved to her other breast. For the first time ever, Lisa tried to push him away. They had to talk.
 
     “Alan, I'm being serious,” she chided, feeling the familiar stirrings inside her.
.
     “So am I,” he answered nonchalantly, his finger returning to the other breast.
 
     “Alan you're not taking me seriously,” she scolded.
 
She was beginning to have difficulty concentrating on what she was saying. Christ, how did he do this to her?
 
Alan stopped momentarily and looked up.
 
     “Oh yes I am...”
 
His tongue had started moving down her belly, making her body quiver with anticipation. He knew exactly what buttons to press.
 
     “Alan we've got to talk about this...” she protested weakly.
 
It was impossible for her to think about anything else apart from the effect he was having on her.
 
     “Alan please…”
 
Alan couldn't answer her, as he was too busy shutting her up, the only way he knew how…
 
 
 
 
 
     After they made love, they lay entwined in silence for half an hour, each deep in thought. Alan was glad he had been able to stop her talking, not only because he had woken up wanting her, but because he didn't want to face up to the seriousness of the conversation. He knew they would have to do something, but not yet. They had somewhere to live, thanks to his parents, and God knows, Lisa didn't eat much, so they would be able to survive on his allowance. The whole thing would only become a problem if he fell out with his parents after Carla was back and they found out about him and Lisa.
 
     Thinking about Carla made him feel so guilty, and he dreaded her coming back. It wasn't her fault he had fallen in love with someone else, or was it? Six months was a hell of a long time to expect a guy to wait without love, without companionship, without sex---
 
     The 'without sex' part of that thought lingered for a moment as he lay there with Lisa in his arms. He admitted to himself that the sexual part of his relationship with Lisa completely outshone anything he’d had with Carla, but was that enough? In the six years he’d been with Carla they had learnt to like the same things. They knew the same people, and their families all got on really well. They were the perfect couple. To the outside world his relationship with Lisa would be regarded as a 'fling' based on sexual attraction, unlike the love that had grown between him and Carla over the years.
 
     Alan didn't doubt that given time, he and Lisa could have as strong a relationship as he’d had with Carla, but time wasn't on their side. She was right. They had to do something if they were going to stay together.
 
      Lisa snuggled into him, and now it was her turn to ask.
 
     “What you thinking?”
 
Alan pulled her closer to him, and buried his face in her hair.
 
     “What about modelling?”
 
 Lisa thought for a minute. It was a possibility, but she doubted she would make the grade.
 
     “I don't think I'm tall enough,” she answered.
 
Alan burst out laughing, surprised at her answer.
 
     “God you're vain!” he scolded, looking down at her with mock contempt.
 
     “Not, do you think I'm attractive enough? Or have I got a good enough figure? Just, I don't think I'm tall enough.”
 
Lisa felt embarrassed when she realised how it had come across.
 
     'I'm sorry, I know that’s what it sounds like - but I have it on very good authority that my face and body are pretty damned good!' she replied with confidence.
 
Alan stared at her, his eyebrows raised.
 
     “And on whose authority would that be?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
 
She burst out laughing and poked him in the ribs.
 
     “Yours!” she answered, grinning up at him. “And you’re an expert.”
 
     “Well, if I’m an expert, then I better check out the merchandise and make sure she’s up for the job...” he teased before attempting to kiss her.
 
     “Oh no you don’t!” she cried, jumping off the bed and grabbing a pillow.
 
      Like two children they playfully fought, pushing reality out of the way yet again. It was as though, when they were in Alan’s room together, nothing could touch them, and the hopelessness of their situation could be kept at bay. But they both knew that it couldn’t last, and later, when they reluctantly dragged themselves out of bed, they started searching through the telephone directory for the telephone numbers of modelling agencies in Chelmsford.
 
     Lisa phoned a couple of them, and managed to get an interview with one of them on the following Monday afternoon. She was just relieved that they had at least done something positive.
 
     “I don’t have anything to wear,” she moaned.
 
Alan didn't think that would be a problem.
 
     “Karen's bound to have something you can borrow. Check it out when you're over there tomorrow night getting ready for Vikki’s party.”
 
Lisa's expression clouded over when she remembered how Karen's involvement the previous evening had nearly split them apart.
 
Alan took her hand, guessing her thoughts.
 
     “Don't worry. This will all be over as soon as Carla gets back and I've told her about us - it'll work itself out.”
 
 
 
 
     They spent the evening with Mike, feeling that they’d neglected him due to their obsession with each other. He was great fun, with a wicked sense of humour, and Lisa could see why he and Alan were such good mates. She had never experienced that kind of friendship, always being worried that someone might find out about her mother if she got too close to them.
 
     Alan had bought a couple of bottles of wine when he had popped out to the supermarket, and before they knew it they were gone, along with the half bottle and the four lagers in  the fridge. By ten o'clock they were rocking with laughter, partly because of the booze, but mostly because of Mike's recollection of the last time he had been out with a woman three months before. The way he told the story was hilarious, and they felt drained by the end of the evening, having laughed so much. They were also tired because of the night before, and Alan reminded Lisa they would be having an even later night the following evening when they went to Vikki's party.
 
     Alan staggered slightly when he got to his feet. He wanted to go to bed.
 
     “Come on woman,” he said. “I want to make mad passionate love to you...”
 
Mike looked at the two of them, mock disgust written all over his face.
 
     “Oh, not again- You're like a pair of bloody rabbits. How am I supposed to get any sleep with you two at it all the time?”
 
Both Lisa and Alan burst out laughing when they saw his expression, and in an effort to placate him, Alan promised to buy him a pair of earplugs, before dragging Lisa off the sofa with one hand, and slapping Mike on the back with the other.
 
     “You're only bloody jealous!” Alan teased, before he and Lisa drunkenly made their way through the living room door.
 
 
 
     The next morning they woke early, having had the best night's sleep since they'd left Scotland the week before. Alan's attempt to be a capable lover the previous night had been thwarted when he fell into a drunken coma. Lisa had been equally drunk, but she could remember returning to the bedroom, having washed and brushed her teeth, to find Alan passed out on the bed fully dressed. It had taken her ten minutes to get his trousers off and get him under the duvet, and she had gone to sleep feeling totally frustrated. Now she was in the mood for revenge.
 
     “You were absolutely fabulous last night, my darling,” she announced, as she watched Alan groggily open his eyes.
 
Alan looked back at her with a confused expression.
 
     “I can't...”
 
Lisa interrupted him, taking advantage of the fact that he obviously couldn't remember a thing.
 
     '”But I do think you should have used a condom...”
 
Alan's jaw dropped, and he looked panic-stricken. If she wanted to scare him, she had just succeeded.
 
     “Oh God, Lisa, I didn't - did I?”
 
Thoughts of teenage pregnancy and all the problems that went with it started racing through his head. Lisa couldn't hold in her laughter in any more when she saw his stricken face. She playfully hit him on the head.
 
     “You're right you didn't - do anything!”
 
Relief flowed through his body.
 
     "You cow! - You really had me going there. I knew that, drunk or not, I wouldn't forget a thing like that. How do you think Carla and I have managed for six years? There are some things I never forget...”
 
Alan nearly bit off his tongue for mentioning Carla, especially with regard to their sex life. He looked at Lisa expecting a reaction, but she didn't seem to mind. In fact, she used the opportunity to ask him more about her.
 
     “Was Carla not on the pill?' she asked.
 
Alan smiled wryly as he answered.
 
     “She couldn't, or believe me she would have been. I hate using those bloody things.”
 
He stroked Lisa's hair as he talked, feeling like a traitor for discussing Carla behind her back.
 
     “She can't go on the pill because it doesn't agree with her. We tried finding a pill to suit her, but it got too complicated - so we gave up.”
 
Lisa noted the word 'we' and thought how typical it was of Alan, rightly taking half the responsibility.
 
     “Would it have been a major catastrophe if Carla had got pregnant?' she asked, wondering how Alan felt about children.
 
Alan couldn't believe that Lisa would ask.
 
     “Yes, of course it would. Who wants to be tied down with a baby at our age? Anyone who gets caught in that trap must be an idiot.”
 
Lisa was surprised at the seriousness of his words, and asked him if he would feel the same way about her, if it ever happened.
 
     “What do you think?” he asked, as he started to nuzzle into the nape of her neck in the hope that she would drop the subject.
 
     “I think” she said, as she threw her head back to meet the delicious shivers running down her spine, “that you’re a typical male chauvinist pig who wants to keep his woman in the bed for one thing -  and one thing only!”
 
Alan rested his chin on her bare shoulder whilst his arms encircled her from behind.
 
     “You could be right’ he whispered in her ear, before his hands starting to work their magic on her body.
 
It worked. The need for serious conversation was eliminated yet again...