| Humor Fiction posted August 13, 2024 |
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When one word changes, so does the promotional write-up
Misread
by Rachelle Allen
The Importance of a Single Letter Contest Winner
Hairy Potter
After living a life of seclusion among the flora and fauna of nature, a woman with the unfortunate affliction of hypertrichosis - the thick growth of hair across the entirety of one's face - moves to a small town in the UK to start a floral business, where she creates magical potted gardens for the monied townsfolk. She cleverly wears a birkha to hide her overly abundant facial follicles and becomes a mysterious phenomenon/celebrity potter...until the day a jealous competitor unmasks her.
Gone with the Wand
At an airport deep in the South, NSA agents Rhett Butler and Scarlet O'Hara are on a mission to save their private airport from being destroyed by an aggressive, ever-encroaching corporate giant. Interloper after sketchy interloper tries to get through their checkpoints to prove to the American Aviation and Aeronautics Board that their small airport is standing in the way of progress. But Rhett and Scarlett - and their trusty wands - never let subversives pass through their security gates. A page-turning thriller from start to finish, with an ending that will make you give a damn.
The Adventures of Huckleberry Fine
He may be uneducated in the ways of books and studying, but Huckleberry Fine is Da MAN when it comes to luring women into being mesmerized by his charmisa and talented, ever-moving hands. Watch his boyish charm and devil-may-care attitude get him into - and out of - trouble time after time after time. ADVISORY: Nude swim scenes, Adult situations involving body painting, and dirty, filthy pillow talk.
Of Mace and Men
George and Lenny, two seeming losers in the Dust Bowl of America during The Great Depression, find their pot of gold when they stumble upon a recipe for a product that will keep women safe at all times from the wanton ways of the stronger sex: MACE! They travel the country trying to convince potential prospects to look beyond appearances and judge on the merit of the sales pitch for this product that can save their life when misfortune strikes THEIR lives and threatens them physical harm.
The Food, The Bad and the Ugly
If you can't be a good example, the saying goes, at least have the decency to be a cautionary tale for others of what NOT to become. This book presents culinary flops of every possible permutation: flat souffles, runny meringues, blackened omelettes, and even weevil-infested flour. You name it, this book presents it in all its hideous, humiliating shortfalls, with vivid pictures and step-by-step instructions of where it all went wrong. ADVISORY: Not for those with a quick gag-reflex.
Dearth of a Salesman
In sales, less is not more, less is exponentially less. FAR too 'less.' End-up-in-the-Poor-House less! This how-to manual for those in sales teaches how to never, EVER show a dearth when you're doing a sales pitch. Slogans like: Always Go for the Gusto, Fish for the Whale of a Sale, Never Give Up, Wear your customers down until they say "yes" just to get you to leave will all become your way of life...your "new normal."
It also teaches how to write irrevocable contracts that will be upheld in a court of law and how to say the words, "Trust me!" with a straight face and sincere eyes. A must-read for every genre of salesman. The holy grail and King James Bible of sales techniques and how-to's, all rolled into one brilliantly presented tome! Supplies are limited! Buy now so you don't miss out!
Hairy Potter
After living a life of seclusion among the flora and fauna of nature, a woman with the unfortunate affliction of hypertrichosis - the thick growth of hair across the entirety of one's face - moves to a small town in the UK to start a floral business, where she creates magical potted gardens for the monied townsfolk. She cleverly wears a birkha to hide her overly abundant facial follicles and becomes a mysterious phenomenon/celebrity potter...until the day a jealous competitor unmasks her.
Gone with the Wand
At an airport deep in the South, NSA agents Rhett Butler and Scarlet O'Hara are on a mission to save their private airport from being destroyed by an aggressive, ever-encroaching corporate giant. Interloper after sketchy interloper tries to get through their checkpoints to prove to the American Aviation and Aeronautics Board that their small airport is standing in the way of progress. But Rhett and Scarlett - and their trusty wands - never let subversives pass through their security gates. A page-turning thriller from start to finish, with an ending that will make you give a damn.
The Adventures of Huckleberry Fine
He may be uneducated in the ways of books and studying, but Huckleberry Fine is Da MAN when it comes to luring women into being mesmerized by his charmisa and talented, ever-moving hands. Watch his boyish charm and devil-may-care attitude get him into - and out of - trouble time after time after time. ADVISORY: Nude swim scenes, Adult situations involving body painting, and dirty, filthy pillow talk.
Of Mace and Men
George and Lenny, two seeming losers in the Dust Bowl of America during The Great Depression, find their pot of gold when they stumble upon a recipe for a product that will keep women safe at all times from the wanton ways of the stronger sex: MACE! They travel the country trying to convince potential prospects to look beyond appearances and judge on the merit of the sales pitch for this product that can save their life when misfortune strikes THEIR lives and threatens them physical harm.
The Food, The Bad and the Ugly
If you can't be a good example, the saying goes, at least have the decency to be a cautionary tale for others of what NOT to become. This book presents culinary flops of every possible permutation: flat souffles, runny meringues, blackened omelettes, and even weevil-infested flour. You name it, this book presents it in all its hideous, humiliating shortfalls, with vivid pictures and step-by-step instructions of where it all went wrong. ADVISORY: Not for those with a quick gag-reflex.
Dearth of a Salesman
In sales, less is not more, less is exponentially less. FAR too 'less.' End-up-in-the-Poor-House less! This how-to manual for those in sales teaches how to never, EVER show a dearth when you're doing a sales pitch. Slogans like: Always Go for the Gusto, Fish for the Whale of a Sale, Never Give Up, Wear your customers down until they say "yes" just to get you to leave will all become your way of life...your "new normal."
It also teaches how to write irrevocable contracts that will be upheld in a court of law and how to say the words, "Trust me!" with a straight face and sincere eyes. A must-read for every genre of salesman. The holy grail and King James Bible of sales techniques and how-to's, all rolled into one brilliantly presented tome! Supplies are limited! Buy now so you don't miss out!
The Importance of a Single Letter Contest Winner |
Harry Potter
Gone with the Wind
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
Of Mice and Men
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
Death of a Salesman
Pays
one point
and 2 member cents. Gone with the Wind
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
Of Mice and Men
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
Death of a Salesman
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© Copyright 2024. Rachelle Allen All rights reserved.
Rachelle Allen has granted FanStory.com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
