General Non-Fiction posted July 10, 2024 |
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I hate things that don't work as expected!
The Sign Said
by Esther Brown
The sign said “Out of Order”. It was also clearly marked “non gender”. So where was the woman’s bathroom? I was desperate. I had to pee something awful. Welcome to the first rest area in the grand state of New York.
I turned the corner, only to find another sign. “The toilet is NOT BROKEN, it is waterless”. No normal looking men’s or women’s restrooms anywhere. This was also a gender free single stall. Fine. As long as I can lock the door, and no one of the other gender is in there, I will be OK. Apparently it is “In Order”.
This was New York. Oh well, I did not have time to keep searching, and the door locked. The single toilet was not accompanied by a urinal so I guessed I was OK. It stunk worse than an outhouse. I peered doubtfully at the pile of toilet paper in the bottom of the dry toilet bowl. It was still partly full of the previous person’s contribution. There was no water inside the bowl. It looked like a flap thing closing the bottom. Kinda like an RV toilet.
I did my thing. Gratefully. Going easy on the toilet paper. Just in case it was broken. Then I carefully pushed the flush button. I couldn’t tell if the flap opened, there was too much toilet paper. Bubbles began to appear around the rim. Very slowly. After watching in fascination as the toilet bowl filled with bubbles, I gave up. I washed up and left. I am not a fan of gender free waterless toilets. Give me back my old fashioned throne with the 5 gallon flush. It is a good thing I didn’t have to poop.
Out of Order contest entry
The sign said “Out of Order”. It was also clearly marked “non gender”. So where was the woman’s bathroom? I was desperate. I had to pee something awful. Welcome to the first rest area in the grand state of New York.
I turned the corner, only to find another sign. “The toilet is NOT BROKEN, it is waterless”. No normal looking men’s or women’s restrooms anywhere. This was also a gender free single stall. Fine. As long as I can lock the door, and no one of the other gender is in there, I will be OK. Apparently it is “In Order”.
This was New York. Oh well, I did not have time to keep searching, and the door locked. The single toilet was not accompanied by a urinal so I guessed I was OK. It stunk worse than an outhouse. I peered doubtfully at the pile of toilet paper in the bottom of the dry toilet bowl. It was still partly full of the previous person’s contribution. There was no water inside the bowl. It looked like a flap thing closing the bottom. Kinda like an RV toilet.
I did my thing. Gratefully. Going easy on the toilet paper. Just in case it was broken. Then I carefully pushed the flush button. I couldn’t tell if the flap opened, there was too much toilet paper. Bubbles began to appear around the rim. Very slowly. After watching in fascination as the toilet bowl filled with bubbles, I gave up. I washed up and left. I am not a fan of gender free waterless toilets. Give me back my old fashioned throne with the 5 gallon flush. It is a good thing I didn’t have to poop.
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