Commentary and Philosophy Poetry posted June 24, 2024


Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
How much is enough?

Greed

by Shanbreen

Seed of discontent in his mind,
muscles strain, he tries to find.
Struggling forth to further store,
unearthing deeper beneath the core.

Dizzying heights to reach without a spill,
Falling back on life does not fulfill.
Echoing the growl of unending want,
bent on grasping, desirous to flaunt.

Longing to overfill his treasure chest,
yesterday left as temporary best.
Bargaining health to further explore,
exhaustive effort for value more.

Susceptible to media ads,
overtaken by glamorous fads.
Unplacated, he pleads with fate,
begging a higher notch on the stake.

Desirous of achieving more than his gain,
hoarding greed, overlooking the latent pain.
Denouncing advice, wise folks being kind,
praying for want, yet to find.

Treating ordinary folk, being unkind,
pleading for love he cannot find.
Meds plenty for the physical pain
no pills to heal the psychological drain.

He awakens, eyes closed,
enlightenment strikes, weakness disclosed.
None near his bed for an offer of care,
wife and children want more than their share.

No obituary for him on a clean slate,
one more chance to atone, too late.
"Up front I have been, never a sham--
Why don't you love me for what I am?"




Rhyming Poetry Contest contest entry

Recognized


There is nothing wrong in shooting for the stars. The problem becomes a problem when we compare the price paid for achieving the never-ending goal. On the other hand, some people simply don't know what they have lost in obtaining what they have gained: "Why don't you love me for what I am?"

The first stanza is the relentless struggle the man goes through to achieve more.

The second stanza depicts how important it is for him to climb up, flaunting his achievements for others to admire.

The third stanza shows how nothing is enough for him. He bargains his health to achieve his never-ending goals. Yesterday always falls short of what today is to bring.

The fourth stanza shows how susceptible he is to media messages, forever wanting more.

The fifth stanza shows him trying to get divine help in his quest for more.

The sixth stanza is his first reckoning that something is missing in his life.

The seventh stanza is where enlightenment occurs as he lies dying on his bed, knowing it may be too late for him to obtain the right currency for love.

The last stanza shows the man changing course, blaming others (family and friends) for not loving him. He argues that he was always upfront with them---never a sham.

The image of gold nuggets is by Suzannethompson2. Thank you Suzanne.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

Artwork by suzannethompson2 at FanArtReview.com

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© Copyright 2024. Shanbreen All rights reserved.
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