General Flash Fiction posted June 11, 2024


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At the Grocery

by gansach


I hate self-checkout at the grocery. But the lines are so long! That's what I get for shopping on Saturday.
 
With a pained sigh, I shift my cart to self-checkout. I hope there are no issues today. Last week, there were two items without prices and my card wouldn't scan to pay. It took three clerks to straighten it out.
 
I begin scanning my items. Container of double chocolate muffins--beep! Tub of vanilla yogurt--beep!
 
"Is that a wise choice?"
 
I look around to see who is speaking, but no one is there.
 
Bag of cheesy popcorn--beep! Carton of chocolate cheesecake ice cream--beep!
 
"Wow! You're really piling on the sweets and snacks, aren't you?"
 
My head snaps up.  "Who said that?"
 
"Must not have a date tonight, that it? Comfort food and Netflix, eh?"
 
I start. The voice is coming from the checkout machine.
 
"What the . . . ?" I stutter.
 
"Come on, keep it moving!"
 
Stunned, I continue unloading my cart. Bag of potato chips--beep! Bag of cheese curds--beep!
 
"You must have a death wish! Salt and cholesterol, sheesh!"
 
"Who are you?" I hiss. "What's happening?" I look around. The customer behind is staring at me.
 
 "Let's get this over with," says the voice.
 
Bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream--beep!
 
"Whoa! Alcohol, too! Look out for you! Hope you don't plan on stepping on a scale tomorrow."
 
"Stop it!" I whisper yell, throwing the last item onto the scanner.
 
Package of feminine pads--beep!
 
"Oho! Well, that explains it! That time of the month, eh? No wonder you don't have a date tonight!"
 
I smash the bottle of Bailey's into the smug screen face. "Shut up!" I scream as heads turn.
 
The PA system clicks on.
 
"Clean up on self-checkout, manager to self-checkout!"
 
I need to find a new grocery store.
 
 



Checking You Out writing prompt entry
Writing Prompt
A sentient self-checkout register at a store makes assumptions about you and your life based on your purchases and feels the need to verbally share this with you. And you must now share the embarrassing/horrifying/romantic etc. commentary with us!
Suggested word count 300

Recognized
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

Artwork by MKFlood at FanArtReview.com

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