Me. Her. Him - Chapter Nineteen

Background: Angela is shocked when William, an old friend from her past, who she hoped never to see again, comes back into her life, after he applies for a role at her work and successfully secures the job. William’s sudden reappearance puts Angela on edge. She’s terrified he’s discovered her secret, which she needs to protect her family from. William’s convinced Angela knows what happened to his former girlfriend, Caz, who hasn't been seen for twenty years, and that something terrible happened to her. The only person, who can help Angela, is her once best friend, Michelle, but Angela hasn’t seen Michelle for more than a decade. Faced with the threat of William’s return, they know they’ll need to work together to save their future, even if this does mean reopening old wounds, and revisiting a past they'd rather keep buried.

****************

Michelle’s exactly the same. Her hair’s still tied back in a ponytail and her glasses are balanced on the end of her nose; it’s like I’m seeing a ghost.

She’s still much slimmer than I’ve ever been. I’d always been a little bit envious of her when we were young, when she could seemingly eat as much as she wanted, and never put on any weight, but then I suppose she didn’t drink as much as the rest of us. I want to reach out and hug her, but I hold back. Hayley’s warning appears in my mind. I shake it away. What does Hayley know? Nothing. But still something stops me from embracing her.

‘It’s good to see you,’ I say, trying my best to keep it cool.

Michelle nods and offers to get the drinks. She tells me to grab a table, like there’s going to be some sort of mad rush. This is the sort of place that looks as though it barely sees one person from one day to the next; the coffee must be cheap. Now I’m itching to look up the cafés hygiene rating.

I choose the table furthest away from the till, and the woman still sitting in the window. What’s keeping her here? I look into my lap, and twist my wedding ring on my finger. I can’t get comfy in my seat. I keep thinking how angry Michelle’s going to be, when she realises I kept a photograph from twenty years ago, when she told me to get rid of everything.

‘So, how’ve you been?’ I ask, in an effort to break the ice once she joins me.

This is the person who was my whole world before I met Paul, I shouldn’t be this nervous. I should feel able to tell her anything, she already knows my darkest secrets.

Michelle picks up her drink. She’s making it far too obvious that she doesn’t want to be here. She’s tapping her foot underneath the table, like she used to do when we went out with Lauren and Hayley. I could always tell she didn’t like going out with them, she much preferred it when it was us two together, on our own. That was when her true personality really came out, and she relaxed.

She could at least ask me how I am instead of just giving me this cold look.

Michelle swats her hand. ‘Oh, well, you know me, same old same old, nothing much has changed for me since we last had contact. So talk to me about this William, then.’

I resist the urge to bite my lip. I glance back towards the woman, her eyes are still fixed on the newspaper; her lips are moving slightly as she reads what’s on the page. The young man behind the counter has returned to his phone.

‘But I’ve already explained what’s happened to you.’

‘I know, but I need to hear it from you again, now,’ Michelle insists, her voice more forceful, taking on the same tone it did when she took control of my life.

I take a sip of my coffee, and place it on the saucer again, wincing. It’s rank.

‘Okay,’ I say.

I go through everything again with her, trying my best to explain things clearly, without getting too worked up. Perhaps she wants to hear it from me like this to see if I’m lying or not. But why the hell would I lie to her about something like this? I’m about to tell her about the moment when I met Hayley, when she holds out her hands to stop me.

‘You spoke to Hayley?’ she says, ice in her voice.

'Yes. I . . . I contacted her days ago to try and find out if William contacted her and . . .’

‘And has he?’

I nod, letting out a shaky breath. ‘He was . . . insistent I’d done something to Caz . . . somehow he . . . that’s what he told her.’ I shake my head. ‘Then this arrived . . . yesterday.’

I pull the photo out from within my pocket, and throw it onto the table in front of Michelle. Michelle picks up the photo, turns it over, and stares at it for what seems like a long time, like it’s a rare object on display in a museum. I rub my back and lean forward in my seat.

‘Does he know about Norfolk?’ Michelle asks, placing the photo back on the table. ‘Did Hayley mention anything about that weekend?’

‘I don’t know, I think he only thinks we did something to Caz. I don’t think he has the full knowledge of exactly what happened.’

Michelle’s shoulders rise and fall. It’s like I’m back in Olivia’s office, waiting for her to reprimand me. I wrap my hands around my cappuccino.

‘That’s the point though here, isn’t it Angela. He thinks you did something to Caz. If he has evidence, I’m sure he would’ve presented you with that by now.’

I glance at the photo, the word killer searing into the back of my mind.

‘He thinks I killed her,’ I say. ‘He must have something solid to think that, he wouldn’t just arrive at that conclusion out of the blue.’

‘But why wouldn’t he go to the police, and get them to investigate?’ Michelle says.

‘Because . . . Because of Rebecca. He wants . . . he wants Rebecca.’

‘Exactly,’ Michelle says. ‘If he goes to the police with this, then he risks losing Rebecca forever, if she is the reason why he’s come back, we still don’t know that yet. But if he plays his cards right . . .’

‘Michelle, we can’t let Rebecca find out he’s her dad,’ I say, slapping my hand on the table, which makes Michelle glare at me. ‘If she knows the truth about him, she’s going to want to find out . . .’

‘I know,’ Michelle cuts across me. ‘Be quiet, I’m trying to think.’

I sit back in my seat. I can hear the sound of people talking, and I realise the guy working must’ve switched a television on somewhere in the back of the shop, or a radio. The woman at the front of the shop is finally getting up, and pulling on her coat. She looks back towards us, shakes her head, then leaves.  

‘But if he already suspects Rebecca is his, why hasn’t he just come out and asked me?’ I say.

‘Perhaps he . . . look, I don’t suppose you managed to get his address at all, while you were at work?’

‘No, I . . . I didn’t pay attention when I was looking at his CV. Why do you want his address?’

Michelle hasn’t even touched her drink yet. Perhaps she chose this place because it would be convinenant for us to talk without the risk of many people overhearing us.

‘You’ve not exactly been sacked from your job, have you?’ she asks.

‘No. Well, I’ve no idea what my boss will choose to do with me next.’

Olivia will be weighing up her options over the next couple of days. She may even have already come to a decision on what to do with me. The thought makes my stomach contract.

‘Okay, here’s what I want you to do. If you can, try and get a copy of his CV, and find his address.’

My stomach plummets. I’ll get caught if I go snooping around for information about him, there’s no way I’m going to be able to come up with some sort of excuse if Olviai finds out. ‘What if he gave a false address?’

‘I’m coming to that. If for some reason you can’t get his address, or as you say, it is a false address, then you’ll have to follow him.’

‘Follow him. But he’ll see me, I’m sure he will.’ This is ridiculous. She doesn’t seem to realise how dangerous he is, does she not remember what he was like when we first knew him?

‘Look, if it’s going to be too much of an issue, then perhaps I can do it,’ Michelle says, holding her hands up like she’s accusing me of giving up.

I try to picture myself following William out of the car park, trying to keep as close a distance as possible, but not too close so he’ll see me. My mind is racing at the thought. It won’t work. He’ll see me and then it’ll all be over. 

‘But what then?’ I say.

‘Look, I might be able to get hold of some supplies that can help us, and then we can deal with this, and William. But first, I need you to find this out for me. Is this something you can do for me, Angela?’

'Michelle, I don’t . . . I can’t.’

Michelle leans forward on the table. ‘Angela, this is Rebecca we’re thinking about here. We need to protect her, remember. If she finds out the truth, it’ll be over for you, we can’t afford to think about others, we have to stay focused. William didn’t have to get involved in this, but now, he’s sealed his fate. If he didn’t want to get hurt, then he should’ve stayed away.’  

‘But I can’t go through what happened before again,’ I say, tears prickling my eyes. ‘It took me years to recover after and I still don’t think I’m fully recovered now.’  

‘You don’t have to do anything,’ Michelle says. ‘Just get this information for me, and I’ll sort it, okay. Everything will be fine, Angela. Trust me.’

Michelle squeezes my hand which sends an electric shock racing round my body.

‘Okay,’ I say.

************

Character List:

Angela Watkins - Protagonist 

Paul Watkins - Angela's husband

Rebecca Watkins - Angela's daughter 

Michelle Blake - Angela's former best friend 

Kirsty - Receptionist (Angela's friend) 

Olivia - Angela's boss

William Harris - Angela's former friend 

Caroline (Caz) - Angela's friend 

Hayley - Angela's former friend

Lauren - Angela's former friend