Children Poetry posted September 17, 2023

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The Annals of Toby Toad Part Two

Alien Nation

by Paul Manton


Within a galaxy far away,
An Earth like ours has had its day,
Because the naughty Toby Toad
Had raced out, reckless, in the road.
Unluckily, his planet Mars
Was quite unused to trucks and cars -
They hyper-beamed, just like Star Trek,
At twice the speed of light. (That’s quick!)
But ’spite their being so advanced,
The human race had them entranced:
Ten billion beings crammed together,
All putting up with awful weather!
And so old-fashioned when they travelled -
It left transport historians baffled!
They’re only fit for a museum -
It made the Martians laugh to see ’em!
‘Let’s send our top professor there
 To study all that old scrap-ware
 The humans think’s the latest thing -
 They’re probably tied up with string!’
And so our alien enforcer
Hitches a ride on a flying-saucer;
They get to Earth in just a trice,
Concealed by a cloakíng device.
Of course, he and his faithful crewmen
Are made to look completely human:
They’ve had ev’ry inoculation
To keep them safe on their vacation.
A weightless, strong, titanium shell
Withstands all kinds of shock as well.
What could go wrong? Well, what bad luck
When they are flattened by a truck!
Of course, they all survive the trauma,
Protected by their body armour -
But nothing makes a Martian meaner
Than squashing like a concertina!
For three days and four hours they wait,
Until their cells regenerate.
Then these men of the Martian nation
Seek a swift retaliation!
They take out their galactic phones
(Sungsam 90s with Star Wars tones)
Which now project a 3D image -
Their leader listens to their message:
‘I watched the televised disaster -
 It’s obvious it’s you they’re after.
 There is no way a little boy
 Could ever totally destroy,
 On such a scale, his neighbourhood - 
 This is a plot as thick as mud;
 This Marsist prejudice must end -
 So all the battle fleet I’ll send.
 You’ll rue the day you mocked our nation -
 Prepare for your annihilation!’
And so it was, with shock and awe,
The Martian nation went to war.
Alas, poor Earth’s a smoking ruin -
And no-one saw the trouble brewing.
Unarmed, unsure, uncomprehending,
The people watched their culture ending.
    *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  
I once thought Toby Toad to blame 
For this appalling, fatal game -
But I was wrong - it wasn’t he
Who caused such awful misery:
The great misuse of nuclear fission
Was caused by those who wouldn’t listen,
Thought themselves to be abused,
Wrongly, innocents accused,
Had a chip upon their shoulder -
More and more as they grew older:
To differences, intolerant,
Forgiveness? Always said, ‘I can’t!’
Mocked the weak, despised the strong,
Magnified their sense of wrong,
Until all others unlike they
Had become the enemy.
We, in our local galaxy,
Believe these things could never be,
But ev’ry time we don’t forgive
We question someone’s right to live;
In the mirror, think our faces
Outclass those from other places?
See your hand upon the button
Of our nuclear destruction!
Members of the human race,
Don’t think it such a great disgrace
To stand by brothers, sisters too,
Who really aren’t at all like you!
Our strength in difference is supreme -
Invincible, the Rainbow Team!
Let’s take this love out on the road -
But still watch out for Toby Toad!




This is Toby's second outing - a kind of explanation of the first poem, where he manages to destroy his entire planet! Here we discover that it is a corresponding solar system in an alternative universe. (Those aware of Superstring Theory will find this a simple idea.)

The speed of light is 300,000km per second (or 186,000 miles per second) so twice that would be 600,000 km/second - that, as they say in Finchley, is 'knocking on!'

A reminder that the first part of the story is called 'Save the Planet!'

Parts three and four resume the story - so annihilation is not the final word? Wait to see!

For those still confused, Toby Toad is the name of an accident-prone little boy. He is in no way froggy!
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