Waddle, waddle, waddle, then there's quack, quack, quack, quack, 

On their way to dinner, out for an evening’s snack.

Mum and Dad an’ family on an ev'ning stroll,

When you have eight kids, it's hard to maintain control.

As the youngest you behave, you can't curse or cuss,

But you always get accused if there's any fuss.

Brothers and your sisters, they're quick to spread the shame,

And it is always the youngest, who wears the blame.

You’re always being told, stop acting like a goose,

And when you’re going hard, make sure you’re off the juice

The cops are out to get you cause you’re still a youth,

And your quack, quack is on the wrong side of uncouth

.

They threw you in a holding cell, left you alone,

Didn’t even offer you, the use of a phone.

To call your Mumma, she would come offering aid,

But tonight, she was busy, she was getting laid.

So, I was left to fend, all by my little self,

And I saw trouble sitting there, on the top shelf.

In the form of a tiny mouse, up there alone

And sat right there beside him, was a meaty bone.

So, I balanced up all options, went to aid a mate,

That little meaty bone was ‘bout to meet his fate.

I knew there was no time, no time to hesitate,

I rushed to his aid, but I arrived just too late,

Scarred off that little critter, what now should I do?

I picked up that little bone, had a little chew.

It tasted pretty awesome, can’t beat nice fresh meat,

Meat is meat, can’t be beat, and someone had to eat.

Waddle, waddle, waddle but there’s no quack, quack, quack,

Never thought I’d eat my friend as an evening snack.

But waste not and want not was best lesson learned in life.

Now I can really say, I truly loved Daddy’s wife.