My four-year-old nephew, Chris,
With Grandma Pat, he played,
Then out of the blue announced,
"Grandma, I want laid."

Grandma Pat just stared, and she
Could not believe her ears,
So calmly asked the preschooler,
"What do you mean, my dear?"

"When I want cantaloupe to eat,
I say that I want lope,
And if jump rope's what I want to play,
I say I'd like to rope."

He continued to school Grandma
So that she'd understand.
"If rubber bands are what I need,
I say I need a band."

She raised an eyebrow. Chris went on,
"A cartwheel's called a tweal,
Lipstick is what I call tick,
and cornmeal's just called meal."

"When I wear my overalls,
I'm putting on my ralls,
Granddaughter's called an otter and
it's falls for waterfalls."

Pat Grandma listened carefully,
And thought with childlike mind.
She went over to the fridge
To see what she could find.

She grabbed a jug of yummy drink
That yesterday, she made.
Poured lemon Kool-Aid in a cup,
And little Chris got "laid."