General Poetry posted February 8, 2022 |
oh how coyly you beckon me, banana
Match Made in Heaven
by SimianSavant
|
Click here for a special Public Service Announcement after reading the following author notes.
This entry was disqualified by the CEC from the Diamonte contest. Here was their message to me:
Author,
We regret to inform you that your contest entry, A MATCH MADEIN HEAVEN, has been removed from the diamante contest. The sponsors rules presents all of the requirements needed for this contest. Your entry did not meet the following requirements...
Line 4 The first two words are not about banana. The third word is not about gorilla.
Banana--gorilla are not antonyms. We searched in several references to verify they are not antonyms. Best wishes in your future contests and please read the sponsor's requirements carefully.
Respectfully,
the CEC
This was my reply:
CEC,
You guys are the gods on here so you can do whatever you please. It is not for me, a mortal ape, to question your wisdom and objectivity in officiating the contest.
Just a couple observations on your disqualification:
A- re: "Line 4 The first two words are not about banana. The third word is not about gorilla." >> stoopid refers to banana, which got caught and eaten by the inteligint gorilla. There is nothing in the contest rules dictating that the words in the middle line must be in a particular order; I mixed them, ABAB. The rules simply state:
Line 4: Four words: two about the first noun/subject, two about its antonym.
The specific order demonstrated in the example provided is not actually part of the rules. It was actually me who suggested to the contest creator to host this contest, and to use that particular poem as the example, but if the contest creator had intended to require it to be AABB, he or she could have said so. ABAB is how carpenters bind two pieces of wood and I come from a family of engineers and carpenters.
B- re: "Banana--gorilla are not antonyms. We searched in several references to verify they are not antonyms."
Did you do an antonym check on all the other entries? The contest WINNER did not follow the rules as applied to disqualify my entry. Neither did the example itself. Only half the approved contest entries are antonyms under a strict interpretation:
-Sun and Moon, provided in the example, are not antonyms. They are both celestial bodies, having mass, gravity and orbit of a larger body (the Moon => Earth => Sun => Orion arm => Milky Way Galaxy => Virgo supercluster etc)
-"Our Boy Winston": puppy and dog are not antonyms. A puppy is a young dog.
-"Opposites" conforms
-"Smile and Frown" conforms
-"Food Chain" conforms, although really only in the same sense as the example, not a true antonym, and both are still animals that eat other living things. The antonym exists in the sense of contrasting behavior, but not objectivity.
-"Sloth and Cheetah" does not conform, as they are both animals, merely possessing variable metabolism and speed
-Narcissism vs. empathy conforms
-Man and Woman does not conform, as lines 2 and 6 contain three words.
So in total, 3 or at the most 4 out of the 6 entires you approved (plus the example piece) followed your interpretation of the rules used to disqualify my piece.
But I'm just a stoopid dead gorilla so don't mind me.
-Harambe the stoopid dead gorilla
Pays
one point
and 2 member cents. This entry was disqualified by the CEC from the Diamonte contest. Here was their message to me:
Author,
We regret to inform you that your contest entry, A MATCH MADEIN HEAVEN, has been removed from the diamante contest. The sponsors rules presents all of the requirements needed for this contest. Your entry did not meet the following requirements...
Line 4 The first two words are not about banana. The third word is not about gorilla.
Banana--gorilla are not antonyms. We searched in several references to verify they are not antonyms. Best wishes in your future contests and please read the sponsor's requirements carefully.
Respectfully,
the CEC
This was my reply:
CEC,
You guys are the gods on here so you can do whatever you please. It is not for me, a mortal ape, to question your wisdom and objectivity in officiating the contest.
Just a couple observations on your disqualification:
A- re: "Line 4 The first two words are not about banana. The third word is not about gorilla." >> stoopid refers to banana, which got caught and eaten by the inteligint gorilla. There is nothing in the contest rules dictating that the words in the middle line must be in a particular order; I mixed them, ABAB. The rules simply state:
Line 4: Four words: two about the first noun/subject, two about its antonym.
The specific order demonstrated in the example provided is not actually part of the rules. It was actually me who suggested to the contest creator to host this contest, and to use that particular poem as the example, but if the contest creator had intended to require it to be AABB, he or she could have said so. ABAB is how carpenters bind two pieces of wood and I come from a family of engineers and carpenters.
B- re: "Banana--gorilla are not antonyms. We searched in several references to verify they are not antonyms."
Did you do an antonym check on all the other entries? The contest WINNER did not follow the rules as applied to disqualify my entry. Neither did the example itself. Only half the approved contest entries are antonyms under a strict interpretation:
-Sun and Moon, provided in the example, are not antonyms. They are both celestial bodies, having mass, gravity and orbit of a larger body (the Moon => Earth => Sun => Orion arm => Milky Way Galaxy => Virgo supercluster etc)
-"Our Boy Winston": puppy and dog are not antonyms. A puppy is a young dog.
-"Opposites" conforms
-"Smile and Frown" conforms
-"Food Chain" conforms, although really only in the same sense as the example, not a true antonym, and both are still animals that eat other living things. The antonym exists in the sense of contrasting behavior, but not objectivity.
-"Sloth and Cheetah" does not conform, as they are both animals, merely possessing variable metabolism and speed
-Narcissism vs. empathy conforms
-Man and Woman does not conform, as lines 2 and 6 contain three words.
So in total, 3 or at the most 4 out of the 6 entires you approved (plus the example piece) followed your interpretation of the rules used to disqualify my piece.
But I'm just a stoopid dead gorilla so don't mind me.
-Harambe the stoopid dead gorilla
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