By Stu Harrell
| Author Notes |
My grandmother was an opera singer....she would gather us kids around and bash the piano....saying "Let's sing some sillies"......Best to all.....Stu Harrell
|
By Stu Harrell
| Author Notes |
The Rapidan River is in Virginia.....Shella Rue is a fictional name....a hodgepodge between Irish and French
Best Wishes to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Now Ft. Gnarly had a barbecue
Thus gathered all the troops
A jostle of stringy chickens
And a host of grimy soups
But what made the day
Was the chili stew
Lots of meat and beans
And charms of Vindaloo
Legend has it they were over spiced
Flamed up was a grumpy sarge
For Heaven's sake cried the Captain
Who put the Gurkha in charge?
Tucker was the taster
A jolly vet ladling a spade
He sample Aaryan's spicy treat
Thought he had swallowed a hand grenade
Curried and peppered ruled the day
These corn and fritters tasted odd
A Nepalese assortment
Composed by some Hindu God
Ole Buggers drew his pistol
Thought he saw a demon near
Seems napalm scorched his tummy
He bellowed a hateful sneer
Pillers sampled the entry
Roared a host of noisy fits
Seems the end game down his gullet
Blasted his tummy to bits
Pokers nibbled a giblet
Said it tasted of lava tar
He moiled and roiled about a bit
Then blasted to the farthest star
Sweet Susie had the remedy
For those who survived the tale
Creamy silky Tikka Masala
And a happy ginger ale.
| Author Notes |
The Gurka from Nepal have guarded British outposts for many years
Vindaloo is a very spicy Indian dish Tikka Masala is a smooth and creamy Indian serving Hope your 4th cookout is better than this one Godspeed to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Who put the Wacky Doodle
In the Wacky Doo?
Maybe Silly Billy
Or could be Sister Sue
But before we can discover
This wandering cutesy lover
We have a tiny chore to do
What's the Wacky Doo do?
All the smart folks hereabouts
Pooled their knowledge true
Throwed it all together
To make the Wacky Doo
A jostle of wit and wisdom
From the fancy know it alls
Tis a jumble bumble of literacy
A bowl of sterling cute recalls
With lots of sweets inside
Actually a knowledge bowl
The more you know, the more you know
So not a drudgey lump of coal
But we need some silly nonsense
Like a basket of Gypsy plums
So lots of hoity toity folk
Can nibble at the crumbs
Lots of jumbly phrases
Sweets from the honey bees
Maybe a gnarly turn of phrase
And a whisper from the trees
So tickle up your noodle
And render a little doodle
So you can add a jostle of fun
To the swirl of Wacky Doodle
So if you have a silly heart
Carefree as free can do
Who done the Wacky Doodle?
My Dear, twas simply you.
| Author Notes | lyrics and spyrics and cheerics........Best to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
So light the fires dear Cindy
We be comin' home to you
Light the fires dear Cindy
Our fightin' days are through
We made a stand in a foreign land
And were to our colors true
So light the fires dear Cindy
We be comin' home to you
We served with your sweet Willy
An Irishman dare to care
They selected us noble five
To patch a British Square
With bagpipes a blarin'
And with a rousing cheer
With gallant dear Willy to lead us
But cut down by a Cavalier
We wrapped him very gently
Trussed him head to shoe
And covered him very softly
On the Plains of Waterloo
Near the night fires he would whisper
Said you was near a baby pink or blue
Passed about and around your picture
Now we are all in love with you
The Duke himself honored us
With a modest boost in wage
We set aside the meager raise
For the baby's early page
So us bein' noble Irishmen
From the blessed home of Queens
What better way to honor him
Than to pledge our modest means
So light the fires dear Cindy
Our fightin' days are through
Light the fires dear Cindy
We be comin' home to you
| Author Notes | Several Irish units fought at Waterloo with the Duke of Wellington, notably the 27th Foot(Inniskilling Fusiliers)...June 18th 1815.......Best to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Now Grendy Frump had a bump on his rump
Or so it clearly seemed
He hobbled and bobbled, limping along
A sad state hardly ever dreamed
Attracting only a common sneer
He tolerated "Gimp", Geezle Peats of course
Was he childhood diseased, fussed over for years?
Turned out he fell from a horse.
Now Johnny Burgoyne approached Saratoga
With Brits five thousand strong
Old General Gates called for volunteers
And so Grendy stumbled along
The Sergeant Old Garlic grumped and harrumphed
A craggy veteran of the Coldstream true
Now he had traded his lobster jacket
For the glaze of the Rebel blue
"I pray Dear Sergeant
"I'm a patriot too
I can carry the powder or aid the cook
Surely there is something I can do"
We're in dire need little lad
Our task is hard, tis true
But hit the road with your silly self
We've no use for the likes of you
Surgeon called Grendy near
And examined his woeful spine
No wonder you hobble in sad despair
Happened same to a boy of mine
Musketman said you fell from a horse
Now subject to pokes of fun
Take my Bay in the nearby stall
Sneak him a treat and give him a run
Seems you straighten up very nicely
An Equine trip good of course
Align with the ancient fable
Get back upon the horse
The battle raged sending Redcoats to run
Unleashing a spiral of Yankee curl
In the hazy mist a cocked hat tumbled
Grendy Frump was a little girl
With flaming speed, she returned to the camp
The Bay had led the run
In her grasp,old Garlic's brother
Joined by kindly Surgeon's son
So raise a glass to our dear Grendy
And give the London jug a twirl
A sweet serenade, not a bawdy tune
After all.....She is a girl.
| Author Notes | The Battle of Saratoga took place in October 1777.....it was a decisive American victory.The location is just north of Albany New York. Geezle Peats is a frazzled inability to come up with the right word......Best to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Now August rolls around
And the kids try to impress
Homer tried for football
Polly tried for chess
A sittin' in the grandstand
Was a noisy kid with sneers
A pokin' fun at one and all
Far short of any cheers
Now he was so annoying
A thumpin' noisy jeers
Some called him "chirping Cricket"
Others thought he hid his fears
Rumor he came from another school
And something had slowly healed
He'd been a sport of some sort
But was hurt on a playing field
He bellowed aloud
"Homer, you're fat"
Ha! "Polly lost all of her pawns"
And left the rabbit in the hat
But slowly, they improved
And Polly earned a ring
Homer blocked a field goal
Polly trapped the King
Finally prom had come
And Cricket slurped the bowl
Never one to miss the stage
He finally bared his soul
"I know you didn't like me
Amidst the poke and pan"
"But admit I made you better
I was your biggest fan"
The War had come
And the kids all scattered
Homer drove a tank
Polly nursed bodies shattered
Word said Cricket was in England
Maybe full of preen and prance
But in early June of '44
Our Cricket jumped into France
| Author Notes | As most of you know ....D-Day June 6, 1944....the allied invasion of France was preceded by an airborne assault behind enemy lines. Best Wishes and Good Luck to all,.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Easter Bunny could be a trickster
He could tease and hoot and hail
But his latest trick had a misstep
For old Bubbins was a snail
Starting on Good Friday
He had to climb a tree
There at the top was an Easter prize
The palm stood fifty foot three
As he danced about on all fours
The Bunny staked his claim
Be there by Easter sunrise
And the crowd will be aflame
Now Bubbins was a slow one
Guests at pickup games all knew
He was always intentionally walked
Astride first base in a day or two
Trendy Wendy of the dragonflies
Was called to help the cause
A flutter and flurry of spinning wings
Would lift his tiny claws
So little snails was a pushin'
Friendly ants were joinin' in
Bubbins was a pushing forth
But wished he had a twin
A sudden storm raked through
And washed away his mates
Could it be so close to the top?
He faced the worst of fates
Soon the tree became more sticky
And he was holding fast
A pickin' up steam he was
The hummingbirds had come at last
Lacing the tree with nectar
Ole Bubbins was holdin' clean
Deep in a mossy packet
Was a lovely pink jelly bean
Now the group was cheering loudly
At the crow of the Chanticleer
At sunrise on Easter Sunday
They nibbled the bean so dear
Easter Bunny was rootin' for him
All are pals to this very day
Some legends flutter and fold
But this one is here to stay
| Author Notes | As most of you know, a Chanticleer is a rooster.......Good Luck to all...... |
By Stu Harrell
Now we are a band of hellions
A tormentin' them and thee
A plunderin' and a strikin' fear
We are the Robbers three
You can hear us in the distance
A creatin' more debris
Pure terror we are known as
We are the Bandits three
Impartial to the war about
We give a pinch to General Lee
But still both sides got lots of loot
We are the Villains three
Now we think we frighten children
But little Polly kicked each knee
We run in fear from Polly
We are the Wounded three
Now we all need a little respite
At the house of Sweet Marie
Kissin' it up and singin' a song
We are the Lovers three
Now Early loved Scotch whiskey
In place of Grandma's tea
So we swigged about and swirled a bit
We are the Drinkin' three
Now we was a tastin' puddin'
From somewhere 'cross the sea
Nearby were Union Troopers
Now we are the Prisoners three
So soon we face the hangman
Our lives still fancy free
There's lots of loot near the Pearly Gates
We are the Heaven's three
| Author Notes | I grew up making up these little jingles and have loved them ever since |
By Stu Harrell
Now Pookie liked little mysteries
So let's go find her one
The county had lots of legends
And one was uniquely fun
Now Granny Jilly lived high on the hill
A farmin' piglets to the setting sun
Her little critters were runners
At fairs till the race was won
Her barn was adorned with ribbons
Their speed held all aghast
Certainly they all seemed well enough
But how did they run so fast?
Now the County held a legend
Of Nester the homely hog
Instead of collecting ribbons
He lay there like a log
So Pookie discovered a secret
That Nester had held so dear
That if you gently tickled his tummy
He would whisper a tale to hear
For alongside the Jilly farmland
Was a jostle of honeybee hives
The piglets would oink at them loudly
Till the swarm made 'em run for their lives
Leading the bees was Athena the Queen
And with Nester she cut a deal
Stop fussing and oinking at my beehives
And the races will be yours to steal
So race day meant no stingers
The piglets would quiver with glee
For the pre-race tune had a racy hum
It was "The Flight of the Bumble Bee."
| Author Notes | This little Piggy.......Best to all..... |
By Stu Harrell
Now if you hear a tiny whisper
Of a tale the tall tellers tell
A story as dusky as a splash of light
The legend is an easy sell
For it swirls about the Bayou
From the basins to the sea
They are the brother sister fireflies
Known simply as Spandy and Spree
Guiding the small fishing boats
Through the marshes and the bog
Spandy and Spree led the anglers
Through the grim and darkening fog
But a greater chore was bound to them
From the shanty shacks of the Johnny Rebs
For slaves were hiding in knee deep pools
Waiting escape from the creepy crebs
In the Gulf offshore were the freedom ships
Bound for Boston by the sea
And little canoes would get them there
Led by the lights of Spandy and Spree
Arise the famous riddle
How far could a firefly fly?
Held aloft by the light blue heron
Tiny lights add to flickers from the sky
An old Chinaman paddled the canoe
With his cat named Spooky Tooth
The Molly lapped a whiskey cup
As they paddled toward the truth
He done brung his heavy pistol
Case the Rebs were lurking near
And peered across the Choctaw bow
And pushed them free from fear
Now where the wistful linger
A secret 'tween you and me
The Guardian fireflies of the Bayou
Known simply as Spandy and Spree
| Author Notes | Love the silly verses..a creb is a murky stagnant pool filled with squirmy, icky little creatures..Molly is a common Irish nickname for an alley cat.....Best to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
Once was a pumpkin named Sweet Pea
Fattest of the patch was she
Chubby in the tummy, looked really yummy
Until she planned to sneak away and flee
Now the pumpkin patch was high on a hill
And to roll the side was really a thrill
So she rocked and she rolled
Time soon passed and then she bowled
Soon she was rollin' and gigglin'
So happy soon she got to wigglin'
Goodbye Autumn Gold and Baby Boo
Free and fancy too
Nimble she was' down a dusty road
Quick as legend, hit nary a toad
Tales were told with great renown
Soon she made the Shantytown
Cheered by the peanuts and a green pea shoo
For the poorer folks need a pumpkin too
She bounced and pounced like a happy torch
Suddenly landed on McGriddle's porch
Tales were told with not a lie
She became the po' folks pumpkin pie
Dang went the story that settled and set
That's the best dang pie we ever did 'et
Now 'tween the kittens and mittens
Don't you dare e'er dismay
For like her best pal Frosty
She'll be back again some day.
| Author Notes | Chip a willy and Grendy too.......Best to all |
By Stu Harrell
Now Auntie Ant was really an ant
With a birthday a comin' due
Nieces and nephews gathered round
To plot a birthday brew
There arose a cauldron of plots and plans
From murky swamps of a Bayou dream
Proposals fluttered around and about
The winner was a floating scheme
Now the teens had seen her sad and forlorn
A gazin' at the Harvest Moon
Now surely we can get her up
Give her old heart a gentle swoon
So near about was a backyard pool
A jostle of urchins splashed around
A circle on a stick blew a spool
A gooey soap would take to round
Her minions gathered to access the plan
Tain't no soap bubble can reach the moon
So better perspectives were put in place
For the streetlight near the cry of a loon.
So the grumpy vets of the termite wars
Were ready to aid the scheme
A carriage of pretty magnolia leaves
Would march her toward her dream
So beloved was Auntie Ant
Tina the Tulip pitched in as well
She would give her petals for a parachute
To float home the awesome belle
A dragonfly named Brandee Caper
Would provide the air escort
A flutter of wings with a spool of strings
Would give the bubble support
So they gathered about the swimmin' tub
And scuttled up the side
Lots of pretty bubbles arose
Pick one for Auntie's ride
Expected fringe issues surfaced
To clutter the glorious plan
Snail Boobles tried to sell tickets
A hermit crab squashed his hand
Pranksters rigged a slingshot
And were stung by honey bees
Brandee was late as usual
Fixin' her hair up in the trees
They picked one fluffy and puffy
And dear Auntie scrambled aboard
It floated pretty as blowed up glass
As Auntie waved to the cheery horde
But approaching the bulb
Caused a glitch that would last
Jealous skeeters made it pop
Auntie was falling and falling fast
The downward spiral caused such a fright
The crowd was all aghast
But a flutter of wings helped bring the chute home
The dragonflies came at last
Now in the ant farm folklore
The tale lasts 'til this day
Were you there when Auntie soared the skies?
The buggy alliance sent her up and away.
| Author Notes | These are obviously for the neighbor kids....The idea is to wander outside...stare at something....then make up a story....How did the Tumbleweed learn to tumble?...On a soccer field..in a gym?...Any medical insurance?....Good luck to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
The old man whispered 'tween shots of rye
For I know what you fear
But align with your jaded eye
Tis' not what you wish to hear
Find the Inn of the Idle Gremlins
Near the wharves of the distant ships
Search for the Pocket Fairies
Nikki Wickett will cast her chips
She can become an apparition
Be the Angel of your eye
Grant your wish, then disappear
She'll laugh, then let you die
Her minions will drag you to the deepest pool
There they will let you drown
Leave you alone with loser fates
With nary a laugh nor frown
I entered with a whisper
And inquired of whatever due
A tug to my ear brought her near
Nikki Wickett waits for you
You have come for horses
To race to the plain
Well I have horses and torches
But you'll ne'er be the same
You can stop the Rebs at the River
Maybe trap them once and for all
But beware there are those against you
For your traitors wish your fall
Grant has brought Vicksburg to bear
And now they want him here
The game is to capture Richmond
More years of endless fear
For the Gods of Commerce mock you
Whither away our war will you?
Not now my dearest gallant knight
Years pass before your due
There are guns to sell
And ships to sail
For what use are them to me?
So for now you must surely fail
Horses raced to their fate
But the bridges were kept as run
Not for now was the commerce call
For we don't yet want it won
So your dream of an early ending
Has roiled away with the stream
Lee is free to fight again
An early peace was a silly dream
| Author Notes | Jes' fiddlin'........Godspeed and Best Wishes to all......Stu Harrell.....compliments of the 82nd Airborne Division |
By Stu Harrell
Yikes, who writes this stuff?
Enough already, enough is enough.
Now I ain't no pretty poet
As my entries well will tell
But I love the garble, barble
From here it just be swell
Weaned on Jabberwocky
And groomed with Silverstein
A jostle of Dorothy Parker
Gives me a joyful little preen
Mum says "Pups get a hobby"
Somewhere twixt the work and fun
So I run off to Hummy's Warehouse
And done got me a Gatlin' gun
No bullets pure, now that's for sure
Just a spray of verses per yarn
Shot 'em off in rapid fire
Aimed toward the side of a barn
Homeboy archer fires a shot
That adds a quote or two
Old Cobbler pitches right straight on
Sonnets hid inside a shoe
After hittin' Spiffy in a Jiffy
Came the pocket fairy dash
'Tween the GO GO's and the Dixie Chicks
Was a splash of Ogden Nash
So in the swirl of the judging cave
Came a quiet, tolerant sigh
Amidst all this splendid "Litracha"
Yikes....Who invited this guy?
| Author Notes | Presented by ALPS.....Alliance for Lackluster Poets....striving for new heights....with one member....Good Luck to all.... |
By Stu Harrell
Deep in the caverns of the dungeon ships
Is a verse contest beyond compare
A florid game like no other
All are welcome there
Remnants of the Billy Ruffian
Bobbed to the edge of the shore
A quirky jostle of curious folk
Were the elves of fairy lore
Historic champs were the Spoonbread Tuffs
Who could weave a lyric or two
Close behind were the Beaufort Biffs
In the Halls of Bandy Roo
Pandy Mandy was a Geekshebub
Fattest of her lot was she
Her group wasn't loaded, but fully smashed
For she was judge, umpire , and referee
The planks may be a track for racers
But verses were the key
A shot would fire with each event
Tossed Scrabble tiles made some flee
A hodgepodge game, some bats and balls
And targets here and there
The jistle and jostle of the belching horde
Made some queasy and unaware
Leanest of the lots came the balladeers
The Spinders of Sondaree
Hated by Pandy, she hooted them off
"No use for a prissy jamboree."
Hated worse were the Gargle Bubs
"You may habble and jabble all you see."
"Scrub those tomes in 'yo grimy tubs."
"But not a breath of praise from me."
From far aloft came a clarion call
The pocket fairies chimed in
Sweet Serena warbled a roving tune
That stilled the quell and din
"Lovers last, forget the past."
"But reminded of all before."
"For fearless lad and lass stood for you"
"Once on a distant shore."
"This sturdy beam brought us aloft"
"It's called The Bandy Roo
"Years ago, caught by the stoutest of hearts."
"Came the villain of Waterloo."
Now Pandy didn't get the tale
But figured all was well
At least the Tuffs hadn't won again
So there's still yummy tales to tell
Thus Pandy weeped with sad relief
And gave Serena a crown or two
Then she bellowed aloud "see you next time"
"In the Halls of Bandy Roo."
| Author Notes | These silly verses are written for kids.....the idea is to let them puzzle over the weird little names and picture the setting as they wish.....Billy Ruffian was the nickname for the prison ship that housed Napoleon until his final exile to St. Helena......Good luck to all.....Stu Harrell |
By Stu Harrell
We was a wonderin' Bootsie
What become of Nigel Dear
Was he busted up a dancin'?
With his tummy full of beer
Dear Nigel pledged to practice
And lo the fool he were
Far from his Dear Bootsie
A fumble away from her
Now Nigel is in rehab
His heart is broke from sound
Upon the wings of fairies
He done danced into the ground
Ole Bootsie cheered him on
With popcorn suit be quick!
He couldn't see the floor my dears
When the popcorn hit the brick
But Nigel is ever faithful
And to his dears be true
For in the Dancing Showcase
He always comes through for you
| Author Notes | We were practicing for a silly dance showcase...I was a box of popcorn....I got hurt practicing and crashed into a brick fireplace. |
By Stu Harrell
Tween the twitter and the patter
Not a cookie could be found
Terror struck the ballroom
A square had shaped the round
Not a chocolate chip nor sugar baby
Nor a plumpy pumpkin known
They had drained the pantry empty
With the cupcakes left alone
So fearful were the children
And the prancing ponies too
For if you fought the Grumpy Samba
He make of you a stew
For to chase the Grumpy Samba
Can break your heart in two
But the cookies made a rally
Led by a crabby Macaroon
The Peanut Butters sallied forth
Not a tiny moment too soon
The Oatmeal Raisins fired a volley
A blast of grapes went forth
Sugar cookies caught a trolley
Raced from south to north
Fortune cookies waved their flags
Howling sentiments galore
Gingerbreads squealed in delight
Heard on a distant shore
The horrid creature had escaped
From the dungeons in the round
His snarling minions had run amok
Far from sight and sound
All had scattered fearfully
Only the cookies stood their ground
And far to the north
Went the summons
A clarion call so clear
So noisy and boisterous
The fairy angels must hear
Battered cookies were weary and worn
Alone as forgotten toast
But eternal champs they surely were
And bravely held their post
Alas the cavalry appeared
And the fairies got their due
For the Angel and the Spitfire
Had swept the Inn of Spiders
And captured Samba too
| Author Notes | Silly is as silly does......'Tween the moon and the moonbeams |
By Stu Harrell
Now Scooter Pipps like to drink and dream
Top of the list was a dog sled team
But aside from his soggy swirl and sway
The race was but a week away
Locals said gots to find Scooter something to do
A race of his own can earn his due
There's nineteen boroughs in The Last Frontier
Give him the fables and send him with cheer
Fables of Mountain Men had tales to tell
That folklore list was a mighty sell
So they wiggled and giggled and gave him the plan
Chase the riches of the Yukon like a Mountain Man
So shoot an arrow rising free
From Mt McKinley to the Bering Sea
Befriend a grizzly for all to see
And ride him west to the Hooper Three
Throw a rock to the Russia coast
Fish the Norton Sound
Carry a bucket to the Seward Capes
Then twirl it all around
Then the locals twittered and flittered
Least we gave him something to do
But Scooter had done the list
With only a rock in his shoe
Now the Governor frumped and frabbled
Proud of you we are
So the borough list was added
If the law could ever be padded
So ole Scooter gained his fame
A plaque with twenty as his name
| Author Notes | "Nonsense tickles the brain cells"......Lewis Carroll |
By Stu Harrell
So poor Wendy got left behind
The rail had passed her by
The spiders reached for her
And tried to make her cry
But Wendy had her bearings
And whistled them away
A pumpkin fairy reached for her
Saying Wendy "By the way"
Fear not the ticks
Of the whisper cats
They only mean you fun
You will see them yet again
Before this race is run
The train you missed was a Reb run freight
You are now on the B&O
Wheeling bound she is
With your packet all aglow
For Wendy is a Union spy
The youngest of them all
Carrying a message from Abe himself
A race to a statehood call
An old black man stood waving
Raising a spit of whiskey glass
Press on dear Wendy fearless
Like a brave Kanawha lass
Point Pleasant saw Wendy's delivery
As the Ohio got the Kanawha mouth
So while the Rebs had left the Union
West Virginia left the South
| Author Notes | Lots of fun......Thanks for letting the old guy hang out with you...Best to all |
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