By Ricky1024
"Prologue 2016"
This book of 'Written Word from the HEART'...
"Comprises a lifetime of pains, depressions and institutions."
"I shall break the barriers of 'The Bore' and offer a much needed work."
...
"Only Time can....
'Shed the 'Scrapings of the LONELY" HEART...
"Only Time can...
'Heal THE SHATTERED MATTER OF THE SACRIFICES' OF THIS HEART...
...
"AND, Only my Tremendous Pains can pave the Road of Mankind's SUFFERINGS....
*****************************
"This Frozen Heart in Me!"?!
By Ricky 1024
Written on July 22, 2016 at 7:24 AM.EST.
Completed at 7:31AM.EST.
(A SIX MINUTE SLAMMED POEM)
"Oh, what's to become of me?"
"Dear Lord my Only Love....
"My Only Son...
"My Only Wife..
"All is now lost like a throw of the Dice?"
...
"Contiplated taking my Life...
"Knife to This Frozen Heart...
"Twice..
"Then again, to the side of the Neck...
"THRICE!"
...
"Oh Lord, woe tis me!"
"No more family!"
"This Woe of Woe won't let me go!"
"All I do is think of Jay....
"Crying Dread gets in my way!"
"Oh Lord, what should I do?"
"Attempt again and do what I must now do?"
...
"But, Suicide is...
'A One Way Road' and it is not my Friend!"
"So, for now I shall just write and try to relieve....
"My Bittered Woe!"
...
"For my life is now so Broken....
"For now I must Die!"
"Tears of Bittered Years'
cloud my...
'BROKEN Eyes!'
"Darkened Skies of Dread" dance now in My Sickened Head!"
...
"Yes Lord, better off Dead!"
"And, farewell I now bid, as 'Icy and Boney Fingers' close my Coffins Lid!"
...
"So, I bid farewell as I again, will try to die...
"And, off to Hell, it's such a Sin...
"Can You Lord not feel and see...
"The Frozen Heart in Me?"
24.
| Author Notes |
"Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the Christ, Fan Story And Tom the Owner And administrator, Fan Art Review, and this amazing artist 'avmurry' and her picture...
"Power of the Written Word" |
By Ricky1024
"The Son He Used to Be"
By Ricky1024
And Jason Richard Smrkovsky
(From Heaven)
Written on July 25th, 2016.
Part Number One
*****************************
"Once Not Upon A Time...
"When Life for me was sweeter than Wine...
....
"November 5th, 1984.:
"NEE"
"For me...
"A Son in order of Two plus Three...
"Girl, girl, girl, boy, and girl..
"Nice...
...
"Nichole Megan Harbach and Kyle Erin...
Corrine Alexis, Jason Richard, and Dana Alyse Smrkovsky."
"But...
...
"Springs turned into Summers...
"Summer back into Springs...
"My flowers boomed in every room...
...
"Back to School came and went...
"And Winter lost Fall..
"And, through it all..
"The mostly good but sometimes sad...
"Through the Wonder of it all...
"My family grew...
"If I only knew...
...
"Autumn turned into Winters...
"And, Winters back into Falls..
"And, all the leaves of me ..
"Silently, started to fall...
"Christmas Time as snow coated my so with delight...
"But, something didn't feel....
"Quite right...
...
"Yes, the first went off to college, so, so, eager for knowledge while Number Two didn't quite know...
'What to do?"
****
"Number Two (Who didn't no what to do...
"Would give to me...
"A beautiful grandchild
"My, first of three...
...
"And, number three...
"Would (Like Number One)
go off to "Rutger's University."
"Now, the Last two knew what to do and had their sights set on Highschool."
"But...
...
"Jason (My Only Son) after all of those wonderful concerts and basketball games...
"After all His friends that shared their soul and pains...
"After all that He...
"Wanted to be...
"Something so Horrid, would soon come to me...
...
"A Percussionist with His very, own, *Band...
"The CD'S...
"Jason's Hot Shit!"
"Starting to,do His own thing and enjoyong it...
"Dreaming of graduating Highschool and becoming a mechanic at Brookdale...
"All that He had done and accomplished...
"All that He wanted to do...
...
"You see reviewers...
"Jason set His sights on
"The Brass Ring" but...
"There is this thing called Fate and Destiny...
...
"The Spring of 2003, came in like a Lamb and Left with Satan snatching it up and grasping it's hand...
...
"As The Ides of March would soon...
"Be marching over me...
"And, as I look back at what should be...
End of Part Number One.
Conclusion later on today...
RICKY1024. ,*****************************
Conclusion.
"And, as I look back,at what should be...
"I find myself questioning...
"Time?"
...
"Time for this to end!"
"Time for this to end and for me and You...
"Jay, to go home!"
"And, time for You to go on, with Your life but...
...
"DARKENED CLOUDS REAPPEAR AND THE FORCAST IS...
"TORRANCIAL RAINS... "THUNDER, LIGHTNING, TORNADOS, APPEAR FROM SOME KIND OF SATANIC CREASE!"
"AND DEATH!"
"I HELD ON FOR MY VERY, LAST, BREATH!"
...
"My, Dear, Lord, whyeth Thy raiseth Thy Sword?"
"HAVE I not obeyed?"
"HAVE I not obeyed and slayed The **Beast?"
"To say the least?"
...
"But...
"You I see....
"This life of,dispair...
"Was meant ťo be!"
...
"My Son, My Son thoueth have done nothing wrong!"
"Yes, ye slayed Thy Beast and yes, you tried but...
"Thou, Soneth Jay, is needed now in a VERY, VERY, VERY SPECIAL WAY!"
....
"TORRANCIAL RAIN BESETS, LIGHTNING AND THUNDER, DISAPATE...
Hurricane Winds cease and Tornados fall back in the SATANIC CREASE!"
....
"Angels appear and slowly lift Jay into the arms of Heavenly Father..
"No more need for pain My Son...
"Your Son's work,here is done!:
...
"And, for now and Forever...
"WRITE MY WRITTEN WORD FROM THY HEART AND ALWAYS REMEMBER..
"REMEMBER THY SON, NOT AS HE APPEARS...
"BUT REMEMBER THY SON AS AN ANGEL ABOVE!"
"AND THEN..
"FILL, THY BROKEN HEART WITH THESE WORDS...
"THESE WORDS OF LOVE...
24.
| Author Notes |
*Band:
"The name of Jason's Band before He passed was... "Three Ways to Save" and today, thirteen, years, later... "THERE ARE THREE PEOPLE ALIVE BECAUSE OF MY SON... JAY." **Beast: "My pains." "Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the CHRIST, Fan Story and Tom the Owner And administrator, Fan Art Review and this amazing artist 'angel4451' and her picture... "Only bucket and sand required" |
By Ricky1024
"Share My Words From the Heart!
By Ricky1024.
Written on July 25th, 2016 at 6:51PM.
Completed at 6:56PM.
(A Five Minute SLAMMED Poem)
*****************************
"With Bellowed Heart I must go on...
"No more time...
"Must,be strong...
"With shallows must, I shall stir the*Dust!"
"Lord, I need my Grit...
"Got a I get it together...
"And, sort out my pile of Shit!"
...
"Lord, with Heavy Lance, I shall take a chance and try with Heart to slay The **Beast!"
"It persuades me and advises me but Lord, I must...
"Yes, I must...
...
"God, only You can guide me through this...
"Valley of Pain!"
"God, only. You can help me slay The Beast!"
"As I,walk through "The Valley of Pain" I remain your loyal servant@"
...
"And, with "Bellowed Heart"
I will finish what I start For another depends on me!"
"And Lord, only then can I again find the man I used to be...
...
"And God, I ask You now what's left here for me?"
"Lost My Only Son...
"Lost My Only Wife...
"And God, I got so Damned depressed that I tried to take my worthless...
"LIFE!"
...
"Son, My Son...
"You must realize what you tried...
"And, you must realize what you done!"
"The Pain is in the Game and Suicide is a One Way Ride!"
...
"Yes, Lord God, but what more could I do?"
"So damned depressed most would xo...
"What I now should do!"
...
"Yes My son, depression and Pain are all part of "Human Descretion!"
"You learned a well needed lesson!"
"And, you are here because I need you near!"
...
"Now dry those mellowed tears!"
"Dig down deep and try to,forget all of those past, wasted yeats!"
"And My Son...
"DIG DOWN DEEP INTO...
"YOUR HEART AND DO...
"WHAT HE WANTS YOU TO DO!"
"And never forget what He had done and what You must start!"
"And, always and forever...
"Share My Words From the HEART....
24.
| Author Notes | "Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the CHRIST, Fan Story And Tom the Owner And administrator, Fan Art Review and this amazing artist ' |
By Ricky1024
"The Perfect Circle?"
By Ricky1024
Written on July27th, 2016
"Nee! "
"Birth for you and me!"
"Around and around...
"We go on...
"The Great Circle of Life!"
"First, lost the Son...
"Then, lost the Wife...
"Finally, almost lost my Life...
...
"Around and around...
"First your up...
"Then, YOUR down!"
"Over and over like gerbils in a cage!"
"Enjoy this life it's all the rage!"
"Travel....
"The Great Tredmill" with me?"
"Come and enjoy all that was meant to be!"
"Marry and take a wife!"
"Have a few kids and enjoy your new life?"
...
"First, watch your only Son die...
"Right before your shocked eyes!"
"Not enough ladies?"
"Well this one will drive you CRAZY!"
....
"Only, eight months later...
"After losing your Only Son...
"Try watching your only Wife take Her very, own, Life!"
...
"Now from the beginning to the very end...
"The Great Circle of Life...
"Amen...
24.
By Ricky1024
"Writing from Heaven" (A)
By Ricky1024 and Jason Richard Smrkovsky
Written on August 2, 2016 at 4:24 AM
******?******?*****?*****?***
"From the Vastness of My Broken Heart...
"From the Aloness of My Wounded Soul...
"From the Confusions of My
Damaged Brain....
"And from My Comatose.....
"Body at Rest...
"We present to thee...
"Writings from Heaven"
....
"Cold and Icy Fingers Grasp my Coffin's Lid!"
"I rise and am an accepted as expected..
April 2003
...
"My name is Jason Richard Smrkovsky and I have something to share!"
"Writings from Heaven" to share!"
"And, as I Bear My Soul....
"As Life's Horridness wanders and watch's waits for another...
"I shall try and bare, My Soul
...
"I am not an accomplished writer or reader of words...
"But what I can offer to you...
"Are My Amazing Thoughts,...
"I would like to share...
"My Written Word...
To be continued sometime today.
24.
| Author Notes |
Speciaĺ thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the Christ, Fanstory And Tom the Owner And administrator, Fan Art Review, and this amazing artist Ricky 1024 and his picture...
"Just Jay " |
By Ricky1024
"Dreaming in a Misty Cloud of Blue" (Part A)
(A Dedication)
By Ricky1024 and Jason Richard Smrkovsky
Written on August 1, 2016 at?
*****************************
"As in Earth as it is in Heaven"
"If, only Dreams Could Come True in Blue?"
"Lord above?"
...
"First, I lost my Only Son....
"And then...
"Only Eight, months, later...
"My Only Wife...
"What would you do?"
"If this happened to you?"
"Dream in Misty Blue?"
...
"My Son, your Only Son Jay...
"Is right here this very day..
"But Lord, for You had Your taking...
"Taking away...
"My Only Son...
"My ONLY Jay?"
...
"No more and *'Ever Pure' that sad, oh, so, sad...
"Day..
"Never sure...
"Life is such a test...
"And we are Your lure..
"For This this Lord, is all I can say!"
...
"If Only Dreams Could Come True but they don't...
"Won't...
"Happen to...
"For me or...
"For you...
...
"What would you do as you were dreaming of having your dead Son back...
"Could Not...
"And, would not come True?"
"What would you want, what would you do?"
...
"Have your lost Son start...
"Again...
"His **band?"
"Graduate High School and enter 'Technical Training School' to become a mechanic?"
"Lord, I'm in a panic!"
"All of these things and more...
"Went out the FUC****
DOOR!"
...
"Never more I now say!"
"We all can't have it forever our way!"
States the Lord.
"And, no more Ever Pure!"
"Your Son Jay, is okay and this is where He shall always stay and always be...
"Safe, sound, and ***asleep...
...
"Floating in....
"A Misty Cloud...
"Forever askew..
"Just like you wished....
"Dreaming in a Misty Cloud of Blue...
*****************************
"If Only Wishes Would Come True?" (Part B)
"Lord Above...
"If Only Wishes Would Come True...
"I'd wish of You...
"I'd Wish of You for 'Everlasting Peace for this tired and old, battered...
"Latter Day Saint Priest."
...
"I'd Wish of You...
"To cleanse this Earth and Replenish...
"With All Your, Worth!"
"And Lord....
"I'd Wish of You...
"Just one more chance...
"For this I now pray..
"For this I now say...
"To say to Jay...
"My Angel Above...
"That I Do Miss You and...
"Send all my Love...
*****************************
"If Only A Miracle and Blessing Could Be for Me?"
(Part C)
"Lord, If Only A Miracle and Blessing Could Be...
"Would Be...
"And Should Be...
"Delivered from Heaven above to Me?"
...
"If Only A Blessing and Miracle Could be...
"Exactly...
"As a mater of Factually...
"What I need...
"And what I See?"
..
"For, I See...
"In my Past..
"In my Future...
"Nothing that will Last...
...
"Nothing will last for me but severe and Agonising Misery...
"Nothing will last for me....
"But Horrid Nightmares and Severe Pains...
"All wrapped up in....
"My...
"My, Forever Shame...
24.
| Author Notes |
*'Ever Pure-'A state of being "
"To have a path, a mission, and a purpose while here, on Earth." **Band-"Jason started a band when He was in Sixth Grade back in 1996 called "Three Ways to Save." "As an Organ donor.. "Today over thirteen, years, later... "Three out of four whom received.. "The Gift of Life." **asleep- "To Learn more about 'Organ-Tissue Donations simply call... "My Dear, friend, Lara S.Moretti the L.S.W. with... "The Gift of Life Philadelphia, Pennsylvania." 1- 800- DONORS- 1. "And be sure to tell Lara that Jay said Hey." ********************** "Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the Christ, Fan Art Review, and this amazing artist... 'cleo85' and her picture... "Dreaming Blue" |
By Ricky1024
"You are My, Shining, Star!"
By Ricky1024 and Jason Richard Smrkovsky
Written on August 3, 2016 at 8:22AM.EST.
*****************************"Yes, You are..
"The,Brightest and, Best...
"Star You are!"
"You are yes...
"Shining bright as a Star ablaze...
"Traveling through my Horrid "Mind...
"Haunted and Horrable thoughts...
"So, close...
"Never Far...
"Gone that You are...
...
"I thirst for just a moment again...
"Jay...
"Before You went away...
"I grasp but I slip as Icy Fingers grip...
"Rear and rip..
...
"My Heart is Tears I now Shed...
"There forever...
"For my Son Jason who is dead.....
"My My Soul is Lost...
"Against all odds..
"Against all cost..
...
"And as sad reviewers that this may seem...
"It was absolutely necessary...
"As if it came in a Dream...
....
"March 2003, may,seem so long ago to you but ...
"When I think of my Son Jay...
"For me, it seems like only...
"Yesterday...
...
"When I recollect...
"The thoughts...
"Those HORRID thoughts of that night...
"Remain. forever in My head..
...
"Yes, Jay Your are my Shining Star...
"Ablaze...
"Traveling though the sorrid and lost haze...
...
"And, yes When I think of You Jay...
"It seems like only yesterday...
"Yesterday, when you traveled above...
"And only yesterday
when You left behind...
"All that You loved...
"All whom loved You much...
"All whom will never forget...
"Your gentle touch...
...
"Yes Lord, can't seem to get them out of My head...
"Can't seem to forget...
"Because my Son is...
*Dead...
| Author Notes |
*Mind-
(In a human or other conscious being) "The element, part, substance, or process that reasons, thinks, feels, wills, perceives, judges, ect." "Jason, not only utilized His mind... "The day He passed away.. " His organs to save... "And, to learn more about 'Organ-Tissue Donations... "Simply call Lara S. Moretti the L.S.W.with... "The Gift of Life" Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.: "At 1- 800- DONORS- 1." "And tell Lara that Jay, said hey.... ... "Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the Christ, Fan Story And Tom.... "The administrator, Fan Art Review, and this amazing artist 'Ricky 1024' and my picture... "Just Jay" |
By Ricky1024
"His.....Heart's.....On.....Ice!"
By Ricky1024 and Jason Richard Smrkovsky
Written on August 4th 2016. At 4:42AM.EST.
*****************************
"Trapped forever?"
"What more can I now say?"
Trapped forever...
"My Dear Lord...
"My poor Jay...
...
"Like a note in a bottle that a blind man receives..
"A Poet and Prophecy that nobody Believes...
"A Santa,who forgot his sack of toys and or a deaf mut who now can,hear only Blaring Loud Noise!"
...
"Or a Snowman built on a Summer of Day, who suddenly realized...
"That he will soon...
Wind up...
"In an Ice- cube Tray...
Melt away...
"That is how I felt the day..
"I went...
"Away...
...
"Yes, My nane is Jay and even though I did die...
"There is a reason for that day?"
...
"My name is actually Jason Richard Smrkovsky and I was born.
"Long ago?"
"As far,as I can remember but it is hard, with no oxygen left in your brain!"
"But, (with dad's help)
"Perhaps for once...
"I can get something done right....
"Done, right...
"Today...
....
"And yes...
"His Hearts on Ice as he waits...
"His date with Destiny you see...
"When your whoie sick and sorryful life's gone .
wrong!
"g.
| Author Notes |
"Special thanks goes out to Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus the Christ, Fanstory, Tom the Owner And administrator, ...
Fan Art Review and this amazing artistt... 'David Ruhl and his amazing picture... "Heart on ice" |
|
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